words that begin with f

I always thought that countdowns and celebrations were superfluous because the lines drawn are arbitrary. We could celebrate every hour, every morning or every time we get hiccups but tomorrow most of the world counts down the end of 2012 and the beginning of 2013.

Of course the collective wish for newness and resolve to succeed is powerful. For what we cannot do alone, a group of focused talented people can do better even though success is never guaranteed.

2012 was the final year of the Mayan calendar from a civilization that ended much earlier. But we are all intrigued with endings with particular fear of "The End" or our own end, so tabloids, twitter feeds, discussions built up anticipation of some catastrophe on Christmas eve or the Winter Solstice.

What does not change is that we all end and we do not know when. Coming to terms with that is a key to living fully.

For me the passing year was about letting go and seeing clearly again. It was about unloading burdens created by facades, fortune, fame and fear of failure... things that start with f I guess.

I rediscovered the long forgotten lessons and valuable experience of my past that I buried under a "been there, done that" list. What I thought were nightmares became building blocks of a new me. None of the people who enriched my life and my attempts to love others were wasted.

Even though hard-hearted people may seem evil sometimes and can wield dangerous power, I will not give up on them but will do my best not to join them. What I write is not just cerebral but the words flow from feelings, depth of experience and a desire to live as fully as I can in the time and space I have been given.

People are my focus as are fun, fantasy, forward moving, living fully... why is the title "things that begin with f"? Just like 2013 is an arbitrary point in time, f is as good a letter as any... without prejudice to the infamous f word.

In keeping with my random title, listen to the "all out of love" song by Jagged Edge. My photo shows my love for the fiat cinquecento 500 which is another f word ;-)

Spontaneously prepared

Being prepared is a good habit unless it takes over all possibility of spontaneity. I think this is the source of my remaining despair. It's a dread I'm not ready for today.

It was OK for school because classes and assignments are clear cut and spontaneous activity is duly scheduled. Many jobs are still that way. But the schedule, predictability and our never-ending preparedness may keep us our job but we could loose all sense of what we want. I guess that's what vacations are for: to find the balance of being spontaneously prepared.

Let go!

At the end of the song the Pastor says: "You don't really have a problem. What you need to do is to step back and let God do it."

I love this song because it's sassy and no-nonsense but the message is hard to swallow even though letting go is the simplest action. The struggle this entails happened during my blogging the last few months and I'm nearly there.